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Many couples go through struggles, fights, problems, and issues, and almost reach the brink of breakup or divorce.

Commit to the relationship It’s very hard to work on a relationship when either of you has one foot out the door.

If you have the attitude of, “If this or that doesn’t work, I can’t be here,” it’s almost certain that your relationship will fail.

At the same time, do not throw yourselves back into the thick of the relationship until the hard personal work has been done by both of you.

You do not want to risk the fragile nature of by your relationship by overwhelming each other with untransformed issues.

Find out how I help couples in a 40-minute sample Get Clarity Couples Coaching Session. Work on yourselves These are the most critical steps you can take to succeed in getting back together and staying that way: 4.

Deal with the pain the two of you caused each other When ready, each of you needs to talk about the pain caused by the other, with each person listening intently and taking it in.

You must take many actions to specifically cure, fix, change, shift and transform the behavior and thinking patterns that brought you two to the brink of a breakup. Create joyful moments together, even if they start out small Spend snippets of time together, just being close.

Bring back – or increase – physical intimacy, even if it feels a bit awkward.

They would much rather find a way to get back together and stay together.

This is a good thing – it’s good to keep trying to make love work.

Instead of taking the attitude of defining conditions that would make you leave the relationship, decide that you are in fact going to get what you want in your relationship.